Feeling pretty rubbish today. I am going to try venting all my anger here in the hopes that a good purge will get rid of it and stop it all from churning around in my brain and bursting out at regular intervals. Concentration levels so far today are at minimum.
So, I finally got a reply from my social worker. Apparently, one of the local authorities I lived in has not responded to a check they have to do and my medical form is still not back from the independent assessor. But the thing that I can’t help but take personally is one of the organisations I currently work at with children still has not got their reference in. This is despite me speaking to the person writing it directly back at the beginning of February about how important it was, emailing her to ask her to get it in by 28th February and the agency sending a reminder letter asking for it. I’m annoyed and upset because to me it shows how little they think of me and how unsupportive they are. I sent an email to the organisation asking them to do it as soon as possible because their inaction is contributing to holding the process up and explained how I had asked the person who is writing it to get it in as soon as possible and that the adoption agency is now sending out a third letter to ask for the reference. I got a one sentence reply – no apology, just a brush off. No concern that this is my life and future they are messing with. No concern about how their hesitance at responding might be perceived by the agency. Nothing. I feel very upset and extremely angry that they quite clearly do not care.
I am also annoyed with my social worker, though no-where near as much as I am with the organisation above. I received an email on 14th February stating that most of my references were in. That clearly wasn’t true as I now know at least 4 (out of 8) have been sent since. Now in this email she stated again that she would chase up the missing items and says ‘I know its difficult waiting, but under the new system….blah, blah, blah.’ I then responded to the email and got another out of office reply stating she’s now on annual leave until 31st March! Well, how can she be chasing anything up then?
I also saw an advert on the TV…yes the TV…last night about adopting. Happy brightly dressed smiling people cuddling cute little smiling children. ‘If you’re single, you can adopt! If you’re a same sex couple you can adopt! If you already have a family, or if you don’t, you can adopt! Under the new streamlined system its quicker than you might think!’ I almost threw something at the telly. I snorted sarcastically and so loudly that my dog (who was fast asleep beside me) leapt off the sofa. I then poured an incredibly large drink. Admittedly the advert wasn’t from my agency but still, it was enough to pour salt into the wound.
I now have no idea when I’ll pass stage one. Right now, I can’t see it being any time soon.
Stop press! Just had an email through from the person who was supposed to be writing my reference saying she has written it and sent it in the envelope provided. Now I don’t know what to think. Either she’s just saying that to get her out of a hole and to make me feel bad for saying that I didn’t think she’d taken it seriously (which I did, in the email I sent over the weekend) or the social worker is lying about not getting the reference. That to me makes no sense – why would the social worker stall things, unless there is too many of us going through the process at once. I’ve now asked the person to send the reference again as soon as possible and sent an email to my social worker (even though she won’t get it for a week) to explain what I’ve been told.
Just utter crap.